my statement of purpose
it only seems logical to go to the roots of my new zealand expedition. where did this all start?, the more curious may ask. some of you may not ask because you either don't care or already know. so i guess you can skip the rest of this entry.

in may, i got the opportunity to travel to australia and new zealand during the short break between spring semester and summer session. a friend of mine who i have known since i was 14 or so, her mom, virginia, works for the girl scout council of bergen county. i actually met my friend at girl scout camp. anyhow, virginia's husband is a travel agent and two years ago, he organized a trip to china for people affiliated with the council, or people who were invited by people affiliated with the council. this year, the trip was to australia and new zealand and because my parents failed to take me to asia over the winter break, they agreed to finance my voyage down under. so off little spoiled i went with alanna and a group of senior citizens, save some who merely qualified as middle-aged.

first of all, the trip was a wonderful vacation after an incredibly stressful semester of being broken in as a journalist and reporter. maybe my mindset was conducive to me being swept away by another culture or country. but that's what happened. i found australia to be laid back like a small town but sophisticated and cosmopolitan, almost like new york. my theory is that it comes from the significance of tourism to their economy. the influx of foreigners makes people more aware of the world as compared with, say, your ho-dunk farmer from iowa. the aussies, though, were super nice and friendly and interested and interesting. and the price of a night of hard-core drinking in sydney wouldn't even buy me three drinks in new york city.

and off we went to new zealand.

for whatever reason, the people i met in new zealand were not as universally friendly as in australia, although there were a few notable exceptions. but the scenery was GORGEOUS. the fiords and mountains and oceans...it was amazing.

and then i had no more clean underwear, my suitcase was full of souvenirs, and i was ready to come home, and come home i did, to a very busy, frantic summer. the entire time, i dreamed of australia and new zealand (and m****...) and i started browsing the internet. i thought about beginning the emigration process and going to university there to become a teacher and then teach there, because teaching has always been a desire of mine, but i thought that was kind of drastic. and then i found adventure education, which offers a 18-week course that in scuba diving, kayaking, whitewater rafting and ropes. except for the scuba, i either have done or want to do all of those! (i went scuba diving on the great barrier reef and it kind of made me nauseous. doesn't bode well.) and since i never studied abroad, and this seemed a good way to figure out if i want to emigrate to new zealand (or australia), and avoid the real working world some more.

so off i'm going.

now mind you, this semester, as i've been facing the reality of actually moving to new zealand for five months, i've definitely gotten off the emigration kick. new york city is still the awesomest place in the world and i've met far more interesting and varied people here than anywhere else. (though they aren't always nicer.) and i've spent significant time and energy and effort and emotional investment in making wonderful friends in the states and it seems a shame to leave them. and since all of us emigrating over there seems sort of unlikely, i'm pretty sure i'll be coming back to the states, though nyc isn't necessarily where i'll end up.

part the second
there's more. i have been emailing with an old camp counselor of mine, someone i met when i was nine years old or so. and she's been incredibly encouraging, especially as anxiety has set in. and i wrote to her: I think most, if not all, of my adventurous spirit comes from my experiences at camp. Camp taught me to go out and learn and experience new things. It taught me to bite the bullet even when scared because it's not going to hurt that much if I fall.

i've been going to or working at this camp nearly all the way through since the summer after fourth grade; the place is really important to be me because of the place and the people i met there have been crucial in making me the person i am today, most of which i am happy with. my confidence, my adventurous spirit, my belief that i can do just about anything, my appreciation for the outdoors, my belief that there actually are good people out there (though this belief has been tested recently) and on and on.

and there is a song, perfect for acoustic guitar and campfires, that a counselor from the camp wrote (her name was lefty and the year was 1976, i think). it's called "on the loose" and i want to share the lyrics here with you as part of this entry because it perfectly embodies the yearning in me for travel, adventure, and friendship.

on the loose
have you ever seen the sunrise
turn the sky completely red?
have you slept beneath the moon and stars
a pine bough for your head?
do you sit and talk with friends
though not a word is ever said?
then you’re just like me and you’ve been on the loose

chorus:
on the loose to climb a mountain
on the loose where I am free
on the loose to live my life
the way I think my life should be
for I’ve only got a moment
and the whole world yet to see
I’ll be looking for tomorrow on the loose

there’s a trail that I’ll be hiking
just to see where it might go
many places yet to visit
many people yet to know
so in following my dreams
I will live and I will grow
on a trail that’s waiting out there on the loose

so in search of love and laughter
I am traveling cross this land
never sure of where I’m going
for I haven’t any plans
so in time when you are ready
come and join me take my hand
and together we’ll share life out on the loose