Sunday, July 30, 2006

Ggle Txt

Ggle Txt

Have you heard of it? Say you're looking for a store or restaurant and you kind of know where it is but not really. You can txt the name of the place and the city to Google - 466453 - and Google txts you back with the address and the distance and direction to the loction. The distance can be kind of off because I don't think the program is really good at knowing where you are exactly.

Google txt came in handy a few weeks ago when my friend was looking for the Paul Frank store in Manhattan. We were walking around Soho and Nolita and we were in the area but we weren't totally sure where the store was exactly. So we txted "paul frank new york" and we got the address and it was just around the corner. We would not have found it otherwise. Neato!

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Another Serious One

Another Serious One

The big topic of discussion as of late has been race and diversity. The legal profession in general is not very diverse, but I think it's particularly bad in this city. What attorneys of color are hired by local law firms leave, for some reason or another. Maybe it's because the city is not very diverse, or not in any visible way, so attorneys of color hesitate to stay / come here for fear of a lack of community. Maybe it's the weather. In any event, law firms have varying tactics for dealing with this issue.

I think it's hard to please everyone. We come with different baggage. If you grew up in a very diverse community - maybe where you weren't even the minority, per se - you might want more action. For me, which is really the only thing I can speak about with any authority, I hate making race a huge issue. It's not that I want to ignore it, but I don't think it defines me. I feel like I'm a woman first. Granted, I don't think I really thought about myself as a minority until I went to college and until then, had basically lumped myself in with the white community. Hanging out with my friends growing up, I don't think I looked around and said, Oh, I'm the only minority (or something). I'm not sure what that means. And I'm not sure it's the best way to grow up. But that's what it was for me.

So I don't care if there is or isn't this committee or this or that thing being done. I think as long as the people are open-minded and accepting people, I'm golden. Of course, I don't want to be the ONLY one, and then put into all the promotional literature. But I'm not, so it's ok.

(I'm being very oblique in this post on purpose because, as you might be able to tell, it's about work.)

Today, I have tickets to the baseball game. It's going to be 93 degrees. Our seats are not covered. Yikes. At least my cousin is going to be here to enjoy it with me! (No, not the original plan, but plans change. As they do.) Must go clean!

Thursday, July 27, 2006

The Running List 2: The Coming Apocalypse

The Running List 2: The Coming Apocalypse

I believe the world is ending. The apocalypse is coming. All signs point to yes. A friend suggested that if I lived my life believing this, the decisions I have to make in the upcoming months will seem way less difficult. I thought it was a great idea. But then he said I'd probably end up in the loony bin. Although I could use a vacation, not such a great idea.

So for your consideration, I give to you the signs of the coming apocalypse:

Global events
Lebanon & Israel
North Korea missile testing
Iran's nuclear ambitions

Weather and natural events
Flooding in Mid-Atlantic
Biblical rains in New England all summer
Heat wave in all of California
Locust-like butterflies swarming in Texas

Big Dig
India train bombings

Dubya is the anti-Christ ?

This post is far too serious for this blog. I was also going to add as a sign that I've been sober two nights this week, but that seemed inappropriate upon further review of the above list . . .

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

"Breaking" News: Lance Bass is Gay!

"Breaking" News: Lance Bass is Gay!

And his boyfriend is hot.

I got a ride home tonight. I wanted the ride never to end, as we got lost and drove in a big circle. Keep going around, I thought to myself. If the situation were different, as in there were just two instead of three, I would have climbed into his lap. OK, not really. But he has the cutest smile. . .

On Movies

On Movies

Sometime last year, Bravo, the network that brought you Queer Eye and Project Runway, released a list of the 100 Funniest Movies of All Time. I can't find the list on their website, so I've taken this from someone's blog. (You don't care which blog, so I'm not going to provide a link. I found it on Google anyway.) Bravo has little or no authority to actually issue a comprehensive list. But I think lists are fun and they may provoke thought. They are also tidy ways to organize . . . everything. So I present the list here:

100. Anchorman
99. The Birdcage
98. School of Rock
97. Happy Gilmore
96. Four Weddings and a Funeral
95. Harold and Kumar go to White Castle
94. Waiting for Guffman
93. The Aristocrats
92. Father of the Bride
91. Revenge of the Nerds
90. Clueless
89. Slapshot
88. Team America: World Police
87. The Kentucky Fried Movie
86. Zoolander
85. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
84. Silver Streak
83. Sister Act
82. Tootsie
81. Half Baked
80. Lost in America
79. Three Amigos
78. Bananas
77. Flirting With Disaster
76. Ghostbusters
75. Dumb and Dumber
74. Trading Places
73. City Slickers
72. Moonstruck
71. Roxanne
70. Nutty Professor
69. The Blues Brothers
68. Broadcast News
67. Kingpin
66. Dazed and Confused
65. Office Space
64. This is Spinal Tap
63. Manhattan
62. The Pink Panther
61. Election
60. When Harry Met Sally…
59. Police Academy Series
58. Private Benjamin
57. Swingers
56. Young Frankenstein
55. Bull Durham
54. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
53. Dr. Strangelove
52. Meet the Parents
51. National Lampoon's Vacation
50. The Princess Bride
49. American Pie
48. American Graffiti
47. 9 to 5
46. The Incredibles
45. Raising Arizona
44. Sixteen Candles
43. What About Bob?
42. Harold and Maude
41. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
40. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
39. Mrs. Doubtfire
38. Best in Show
37. Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
36. Good Morning, Vietnam
35. Beetlejuice
34. Rushmore
33. Clerks
32. Groundhog Day
31. The Big Lebowski
30. The 40-Year-Old Virgin
29. Legally Blond
28. Annie Hall
27. A Fish Called Wanda
26. Wayne’s World
25. Meet the Fockers
24. Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure
23. Big
22. Beverly Hills Cop
21. Shampoo
20. The Jerk
19. Wedding Crashers
18. Stripes
17. M*A*S*H
16. Old School
15. Fast Times at Ridgemont High
14. Napoleon Dynamite
13. Naked Gun (series)
12. The Producers
11. Pee Wee’s Big Adventure
10. Arthur
9. Blazing Saddles
8. The Wedding Singer
7. Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
6. Airplane
5. South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
4. There’s Something About Mary
3. Shrek
2. Caddyshack
1. Animal House

In other movie news, I purchased a copy of Map of the Human Heart. I watched this movie for a college media studies class. It's a beautiful love story - both beautifully shot and beautifully told. One of my favorite scenes involves one of the couples laying on top of a hot air balloon. And to top it off, John Cusack is in it.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Here's the Word, Pass It On

Here's the Word, Pass It On

My friend alerted me to these rumors brewing on the internet. A new Star Trek movie! A Prequel! J.J. Abrams!

And while driving home yesterday, we saw this billboard on the highway:

(This is actually a picture of the same billboard somewhere downtown in NYC.)

It had us fooled. But you can find more info here and there's a related blog here.

Sunday, July 23, 2006


It was a quick jaunt to NYC and back. A quick rundown of the weekend . . .

Stopped in New Haven for lunch. Didn't get to see friends, because travel makes me anxious, and I had a non-mutual friend with me. Arrived in NY, checked in. Saw parents briefly. Went to McSorley's and visited *my* waiter. Told him I try to see him before I see my parents. (Thank goodness my parents don't read this and likely never will.) Flirted with two married men, one of whom was Australian and kissed my hand upon departure. Yumm. Met up with other friends. Bar-hopped through the E. Village and LES - sangria, Brooklyn Lager, PBR, and a few more drinks. Went back to hotel sufficiently drunk. Discovered we had a fire escape, which we then called our roof deck. Sat out there, criticized people who hang sheets in their windows in lieu of curtains, smoked second hand smoke, contemplated life and the unlit Empire State Building. Slept in a very comfortable double bed. Who knew!

Awoke. Ate delicious, soul-satisfying Korean food. Looked at tattoos. Laughed at ridiculous tattoos. Walked and shopped all over lower Manhattan. Pearl River Mart. Saw Jesse Martin riding in a taxicab that nearly ran over my toes. He was hot. Had a delicious snack and espresso in Little Italy. Drove drove drove back to Beantown. Stopped for gas and pee break in Connecticut and two gas stations - TWO! - did not have bathrooms. Wha?

Even a burrito cannot fill the emptiness I feel inside. I heart NYC.

And in other news, I've decided to pursue my crush. Emotionally and ... socially.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Because This Blog is About Traveling

Because This Blog is About Traveling
Last weekend, in some serious drunkenness, a friend and I talked about going to NYC this weekend. And then today we went on Priceline and got ourselves a cheapie hotel room. I'm pretty sure the room will be the size of the bed. In any event, in the morning, we are off to NYC. There is talk of McSorley's and tattoos and shopping and people watching and eating. Yeay! I think we will make a pit-stop in New Haven as well. My friend suggested pizza. I suggested friends. Hopefully it will all work out.

I know what you're thinking. Meh.

Friday, July 21, 2006


I REALLY REALLY REALLY shouldn't have done that.

But in other news, progress has been made, but I've sworn not to make too much progress, because I'm in a tenuous position. I think the best description is that the ice has been broken.

These two paragraphs are more or less unrelated. And yeah, they're full of dribble. And so it goes.

Thursday, July 20, 2006


I have nothing to say. Everything I want to say, I take back. So I will remain silent until I have something to say that I can blog about or that is even remotely worth blogging about. Perhaps I should buy this book called something like "No One Wants To Know What You Had For Lunch" or some such. It gives suggestions for blog topics. I'm pretty sure they have nothing to do with asparagus pee nor break up song lyrics nor buffalo sex.


Sunday, July 16, 2006

Wind Energy

Wind Energy
Ever since I first heard about the Cape Wind project, where developers want to put a wind farm off the coast of Cape Cod, I've been against it. I first heard about it in 2001 or 2002. And it's odd that I'm against it because I am generally a proponent of any type of alternative energy. I'm actually a fan of nuclear power, as well, as it's clean and efficient. People are just too scared of it. Anyway, I digress. I felt uneasy about the Cape Wind project - I feel like the ocean is the one last place we can go and actually get away from most signs of human life and impact. If we've already trampled our way across the land, why can't we put wind farms on land and leave the oceans alone?

But the other day, I got to hear Jon Tester speak. He's the democratic candidate for Senate from Montana, challenging the Republican incumbent who's been linked to the Jack Abramoff scandal. Anyway, Tester was talking about wind energy and something just clicked for me. I don't know why I hesitated in supporting it. So I'd like to officially throw my support behind Cape Wind and other similar projects.

For crying out loud, the world is ending. This summer there has been massive flooding in New England and the Mid-Atlantic. The sky (or ceiling) is falling on us here in Boston. Lebanon and Israel are practically in a war, if they aren't officially in one yet. India train bombings. Iraq. Iran. North Korea.

I'm sure my serenity can handle a few wind turbines off the coast of F-ing Cape Cod. If we build it in time before the world ends.

In any event, I've decided to try and get myself into local poltics. We have a very interesting governor's race going on. Actually, that's about the only interesting race going on because this city is so f-ing democratic, when I voted in 2004, I only had to make about three choices, and one of them was for President of the United States. And for many of the city positions, people don't run by party. But the governor's race is interesting because there are several Democratic candidates, and then it becomes a contest between the blue city versus the rest of the red state.

But I don't think I'm going to help educate myself in local political issues if I choose the Sunday NY Times over the Globe...

12 Stages

12 Stages
Whatever stage of recovery is drinking and partying, I think I've passed it. Is the next stage journaling and having introverted alone time? I hope so.

Last night, I met up with some new friends and some old friends and after several drinks, ended up at a new (to me) gay club. Someone told me that there was a coat check in the corner but instead of a coat checker, there was this British dude with a wedding band. He was hanging out at this bar with a 60 (?) year old woman who he sort of lived with, I think as a boarder, but it wasn't clear. This guy had recently divorced his wife and when I asked him what he was doing at the gay club, he said he was bisexual. He was cute, but...

Thank God my friend was there because I could have ended up kissing two gay men last night.


A memory from early on . . . we were lying in bed, and he put his hand on my stomach and looked me in the eyes and said, "Mine." I looked him in the eyes back and said nothing. I had once said that to someone, where I put his hand on me and said, "I'm yours." That relationship ended poorly and the whole concept of ownership is kind of sick. But I don't think the Boy was saying he owned me, per se, so I kind of appreciated his sentiment at the time, what he was trying to say. And although I wasn't ready to say that I was his in any way, it was nice to know that he wanted me, and it felt safe to try and come out of my shell.

I keep losing my anger and indignation in memories.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Finis, Again

Finis, Again
I tire of the interwebs.

I also tire of hating on women. The Boy and his ways made me feel insecure and made me look at women like they were enemies. They were all Others. I'm sure this phenomenon was not helped by other aspects of my life. That I'm the only daughter (and youngest child of three to boot). That law school has totally amplified the alpha female in me. Etc. Anyway. I'm tired of this. I need to recenter myself and find that part of me that sees life as a journey, a fuck all hard one, and sees women as ... sisters on the same journey, trying to get to the same end. Yeah, we could claw over each other, and some do, but I'm not that kind of girl.

I'd really love to shout from rooftops just what kind of boy the Boy is.

But I'm done. I'm done hating, and I'm done feeling sad, and I'm done with it mattering. I'm resuming my summer of fun. And tonight, I had fun sailing on the Harbor. In thunder and lightning! If the firm is trying to woo me, it's working ...

Dueling Lyrics?

Dueling Lyrics?
Appropriate break up lyrics: Back in Time - Au Revoir Simone

Do you think
(When you know you know it)
If we could go back in time
(When you know you know it)
Do you think
(Listen up, listen up)
that I liked you then?
(I will look for you there)

Would you try
(When you see you see it)
Not to be so mean
(When you see you see it)
And we'd never
(Won't be long, it won't be long)
Just be friends
(I will wait for you there)

There were times that I felt that this was right
There were times that I felt that this was right
What do you think?
This will never work
What do you think?
This will never work

There were times that I felt that this was right
There were times that I felt that this was right
What do you think?
This will never work
What do you think?
This will never work

Inappropriate break up lyrics: Scotty Doesn't Know - Lustra

Scotty doesn't know that Fiona and me
Do it in my van every Sunday.
She tells him she's in church but she doesn't go
Still she's on her knees and Scotty doesn't know!

Oh Scotty doesn't know!
So Don't Tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty doesn't know!
So Don't Tell Scotty!

Fiona says she's out shopping,
But she's under me and I'm not stopping...

Because Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty doesn't know! (X3)
So don't tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know!

Don't tell Scotty!

I can't believe he's so trusting,
While I'm right behind you thrusting.
Fiona's got him on the phone,
And she's trying not to moan.
It's a three-way call and he knows nothing!

Scotty doesn't know!(X3)
So don't tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know!(X3)

We'll put on a show!
Everyone will go!
Scotty doesn't know!(x3)

The parkin lot
Why not? It's so cool when you're on top!
His front lawn in the snow
Life is so hard because Scotty doesn't know!

We did it on his birthday...

Scotty doesn't know!(X4)

Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty won't know!
Scotty doesn't know!
Scotty's gotta know!
Gotta tell Scotty!
Gotta tell him myself!
Scotty doesn't know! (X10)

[Chant] Scotty doesn't know! (x7)
[Chant] Scotty's gotta go!

Mildly inappropriate break up lyrics: Left Me a Fool - Indigo Girls
Everybody loves you
And they want to know your story
You go riding out a mystery
Concealed in all your glory
But when it comes to flesh and bones
You remind me of shallot
Only made of shadows
Even though youre not

I remember how I spent
All my energy and time
With affected conversation
Trying to pry inside your mind
You are as beautiful as truth
And as empty as a shell
And I came to you one night
And it made me feel like hell

Oh to reach through all your surface
Just to find an empty pool
And to suffer all your pride
As I lay down by your side
And you swallowed up my heart
And left me a fool
Left me a fool

Everybody loves a hero
An image to create
The antithesis of everything
Inside ourselves we hate
But youd better close your eyes
When its time for them to die
Because youd hate to think the life
Youd built upon them was a lie

Oh to reach through all your surface
Just to find an empty pool
And to suffer all your pride
As I lay down by your side
And you swallowed up my heart
And left me a fool
Left me a fool

I resign myself to silence
I will never blow your cover
No one ever has to know
Who the hero took for lover
But it has come to mind as you blaze on
As brilliant as a star
How many youve left behind
How many casualties there are

Oh to reach through all your surface
Just to find an empty pool
And to suffer all your pride
As I lay down by your side
And you swallowed up my heart
And left me a fool
Left me a fool

In the interest of full disclosure, maybe I started it all with the last song.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Acknowledge It, Then Move On

Acknowledge It, Then Move On
I'm sad. Apparently, I feel sadness in the pit of my stomach.

Sunday, July 09, 2006


In the end, I was overwhelmed by a sense of dishonesty and that I was being treated like shit. No, I'm not going to sit here while you talk to her for 30 minutes, to her across the country, when you couldn't give me the fucking time of day while you were there. It was just another sign, but it was the straw that broke the camel's back. The camel of trust. The camel of self-respect. The camel of "I'm not seeing anyone else." There were other signs. Signs I don't need to go into. But in the end, I couldn't put up with any of it. I couldn't just do it for the fun because while the fun was good, oh so very very good, the pain was too much and it wasn't worth it. And I'm too emotionally invested to just stick around for the fun knowing that it wasn't going to go anywhere.

I blame him 95%. Well, that's what I said in the moment. I am to blame, too. For flip-flopping. For trying too hard. For not giving up when the signs were there.

This is all part of the process, but it doesn't mean that I have to like it. For now. I will be back. I just have to wait for that constriction in my chest to go away.

If feelings could all just be in my head, I think life would be easier. But I hate that feelings manifest themselves in physical symptoms. Butterflies in the stomach that make you feel giddy. A tightness in the chest that feels like your heart constricting around an empty space. That same constriction welling up in the back of your throat to make you feel like you want to vomit. Oh, feelings are so pleasant.

Yeah, sometimes I do wish I were dead inside.

[End wallowing.]

Friday, July 07, 2006

Manipulator or Manipulatee

Manipulator or Manipulatee?
So I've kind of been sitting on this decision all week, but I'm going to NYC this weekend. (K?) As it turns out, there are a lot of people in town and I want to see them. Random good friends from LA, and I want to see them.

But last night, the boy sprung a conversation on me. I felt one way last night, but now that it's morning and I'm awake, I feel differently.

In the end, I've been looking forward to this weekend for weeks, and I'm not letting him or his crazy keep me from it. Yes, HIS crazy. But the three margaritas I had last night made my lips loose enough to basically tell him everything I've been feeling. Yeah, he started the conversation with "where are we going" and I pretty much said, look, four weeks ago, I was already there. And there is nowhere.

Still, next week, less drinking. I feel like crap. Physically.

[original post redacted]

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Hot Hot Heat

Hot Hot Heat
I slept like the dead last night. And dreamt about The Boy the whole time. Now I need to figure out how to get my head out of my dreams.

Monday, July 03, 2006



I am moving slowly this morning.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Separating the Wheat From the Chaff

Separating the Wheat From the Chaff
Last night I went to see Rocky Horror. My first time ever, but between keeping my mouth shut and other circumstances, like getting into the theatre early, managed to escape recognition. I think I'm a little too old for that anyway. All the people who were really excited about being topless and making out with another girl were all about 19 years old. Tops. But still, it was fun. What a bizarre movie. Although I can't ever see myself becoming so into a movie that I would take time out of my life to act it out, I can kind of see why such a phenomenon occurs. It detracts from the bizarreo nature of the film and really seems like the only natural thing to do.

I think tomorrow I am going rock climbing. OUTDOORS. Yeay!

Tonight, I am seeing We Are Scientists in action. No, they will not be making magic with beakers and solutions and lab coats, but will instead enchant us and try to better the world with drums, bass and guitar.

Man alive, four day weekends rule. I don't think I've slept in until 11 since work started.

(Maybe I was trying too hard.)

As If Calories Weren't Bad Enough

As If Calories Weren't Bad Enough

More Cadbury bars tested for bug
From the BBC

Food safety officials in Birmingham are testing a range of Cadbury's chocolate bars over fears more brands may be contaminated with salmonella.

Cadbury's removed one million bars across seven brands last week after traces of salmonella had been found in some chocolate.

Food safety teams from Birmingham City Council are now testing a range of Cadbury products for salmonella.

But a team spokesman said chocolate on sale in shops was safe to eat.

The 250g Dairy Milk Turkish, Dairy Milk Caramel and Dairy Milk Mint bars, the Dairy Milk 8 chunk and the 1kg Dairy Milk bar have been affected by the scare along with the 105g Dairy Milk Buttons Easter Egg and the Freddo bar.

Possible further contamination

Cadbury has blamed a leaking pipe at its Marlbrook plant, near Leominster, Herefordshire, for the salmonella contamination.

Gavin Tringham, from the city council's food safety team, said: "As result of the publicity last week and in cooperation with Cadbury's we are independently testing both current products lines and past product lines that have be returned.

"This is to ascertain if there is any contamination of current or past stock."

The testing is taking place as it emerged the mix used in the products that have been withdrawn was also the base ingredient in other confectionery.

A spokesman for the Food Standards Agency said it could not rule out that other products may be affected.

But Cadbury said it had tested tens of thousands of products and found no traces of salmonella.

It is continuing to test product lines four times a day.

Saturday, July 01, 2006


I can't believe the story of my night involves an investigator, four border-line middle aged men on e, strippers, and a gay club. Seriously. HA!