I've learned my lesson. There is something sick and twisted about everything that goes on in law school. I've learned my lesson and while I won't stop having fun with my friends, I'm going to be sure to keep my life very, very distant from it all. And I've learned who I can trust and who I cannot.
But I'm not giving up on my values. Truth and honest conversations are things that we do not share enough of. And even if people are afraid of those hard conversations, that doesn't mean I should stop trying. What I like about telling the truth is there is no backing away - you can always point to it and say, well, it was the truth. If you can't deal with it, well, I'm sorry, but generally, there's nothing else to be done. Generally, things are sorted out after truth-telling b/c it's usually a misunderstanding. And smoothing out the misunderstanding usually fixes things, although sometimes hard hearts and hurt feelings get in the way.
And because we often misunderstand each other, I won't stop assuming the best about people. That a broken glass was an accident and not an attempted assault. That people are nice inside and want the best for others. That instead of overtly trying to hurt others, people are misunderstood and misconstrued. I don't think I have much reason to hold onto these values and beliefs, but they somehow give me hope in this world. That might sound cheesy, but consider what life would be like if you lived it thinking that everyone around you was out to get you. How burdensome.
That's not to say I don't have issues with it. It's not perfect, and even if I can know in my head that something is not malicious or nefarious or hurtful, sometimes my heart gets involved and muddles up my head. But I know that happens and I try pretty damn hard to sort it out, let my head overcome my heart, and to treat people fairly.
And I'm not perfect, but these are my values, and even if people prove me wrong time and time again, I am not going to let go of them.
To graduation!
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